Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Page 158 - Martyr trap

I used to have a pretty big tendency to do something akin to this. Make it clear I didn't want to talk to anyone, then storm off, isolate myself, and then get angry that nobody came to comfort me. It's the martyr trap. It takes a lot of energy, is a huge waste of time, and in the end, the only person who can stop the cycle is the one who starts it.

The way I got out was by realizing how tired I was of making myself miserable.

3 comments:

Koneko-Ealain said...

I get that way sometimes too, but more often than not, I feel guilty that I am angry because it's usually something petty I shouldn't be worked up about. Emotions are complex things.

Also, Brand is Mr. Tough Love as always I see.

Urza said...

I don't get that way. I tolerate the presence of people, glean what little usefulness when I can and then spend as much time with my thoughts as I can instead of people.

loren said...

yeah i get how that can be. hard to shake, but i realise that once you focus on things other than the "self" - it is much easier. so in essence, the "trap" is actually focus on self, which sort of, possibly, maybe - is a kind of narcissism.

me, i focus on God. i found that each time i do that things get better very quickly. things - good things - start happening and well, perhaps He DOES see, eh?